Book Club Night Kit

My Dear You

Rachel Khong

Cozy night

Rachel Khong's second novel is a tender, generations-spanning story about family, belonging, and the stories we inherit, told with the warmth and quiet humor that made her a word-of-mouth favorite. It is the kind of book that leaves you wanting to call someone you love.

Come For The Congee, Stay For The Family Stories

We are reading Rachel Khong's My Dear You, and we are doing it in soft pants with a pot of tea. Bring yourself, bring your feelings about your relatives, bring nothing else.

Reading level: Moderate

Best for: A club that likes to linger over seconds of dessert and talk about their own families as much as the book

Discussion

Warm-up

1.Where did you do most of your reading of this one, and did the book end up feeling like good company?
2.Was there a small, ordinary moment in the book (a meal, a chore, a bit of waiting around) that you found unexpectedly soothing to read?

Digging in

1.The title reads like the opening of a letter. Who in your own life would you address a letter like that to, and what warmth would you want it to carry?
2.This book moves between generations. Which generation's chapters did you sink into most comfortably, and what about that time or voice felt like home?
3.So much of the novel is about what parents pass down without ever saying out loud. What did your family hand you quietly, and did reading this make you feel softer about it?
4.Khong writes ordinary life with a lot of affection. Was there a sentence or image that made you put the book down for a second just to sit with it?

Going deep

1.Belonging in this book is something people keep reaching for rather than simply having. Did any of that reaching feel familiar to you, and did the novel offer you any comfort about it?
2.Without giving anything away, did the book leave you feeling tender, unsettled, hopeful, or some mix? Try to name the feeling you walked away with and where in the story it started.

On the table & to sip

To eat

A big pot of congee with little bowls of toppings (scallions, chili crisp, soft eggs, fried shallots)

Comfort food built for a crowd, and a dish that carries family memory across generations the way the novel does. Make one pot, let people build their own.

Steamed or pan-fried dumplings from the freezer aisle, piled on a warm platter

Low effort, high comfort, and the kind of food families make together. Set out black vinegar and chili oil and let people graze all night.

Warm sesame or honey cake, sliced thin, with whipped cream

A gentle, nutty, slightly nostalgic dessert for the back half of the evening when the conversation gets personal.

To sip

Jasmine tea, brewed in a big pot and refilled all night (no alcohol)

Floral, calming, and endlessly topped up. The non-alcoholic anchor of the whole evening.

Hot toddy with honey, lemon, and a star anise pod

Warm in the hands, a little indulgent, and perfect for a club that wants to slow down rather than sharpen up.

Plum wine over a single big ice cube

Sweet, soft, low-proof, and easy to nurse through two hours of conversation.