F*Ck Failure
A candid, encouraging take on failure from a music producer who built a career out of false starts and second tries, offered less as a lecture than as a friend talking you down off the ledge. It is short, warm, and absolutely made for a room of people who have all quietly flopped at something.
Bring your worst flop and your softest sweater. There will be mac and cheese, cocoa, burnt-edge brownies, and zero pressure to have your life together by Thursday.
Best for: A club that likes a quick, uplifting read and would rather swap real stories than dissect a text
Discussion
Warm-up
- 1.Before we get into it: what is one small thing you tried this year that did not go the way you hoped, and can you tell it as a funny story now?
- 2.Was there a page where you felt the author was talking directly to you, and what were you doing when that happened (couch, commute, 2am)?
Digging in
- 1.The book treats failure as something to say out loud rather than hide. Whose voice in your own life gave you permission to admit a flop, and how did it feel to finally say it?
- 2.Benny Blanco writes from inside a creative career where rejection is routine. Did reading that make your own setbacks feel lighter, or did it make you a little envious of how casually he shrugs?
- 3.Which piece of encouragement here did you actually believe, and which one made you think 'easy for you to say'? No wrong answers, we are all a little skeptical.
- 4.The title is loud, but a lot of the feeling underneath is tender. Where did the book feel most gentle with you, and did you need that this week?
Going deep
- 1.If you could hand this book to a younger version of yourself at one specific low point, which point would you choose, and what do you think she or he would have done differently with that pep talk in hand?
- 2.By the time you closed it, had anything actually shifted in how you talk to yourself about a thing you gave up on? Be honest if the answer is 'not yet, but maybe'.
On the table & to sip
To eat
To sip
Run of show
Host tips
- Say up front that nobody has to share a real failure if they are not up for it. A cozy night dies the moment it feels like a group therapy requirement.
- Have a blanket basket and a couple of extra lamps instead of the overhead light. It sounds silly and it changes the whole room.
- If the conversation gets heavy, pivot to food. 'Who wants more cider' is a perfectly good transition.
Playlist
Soft, hopeful pop and singer-songwriter warmth, kept low enough to talk over, the sound of a kitchen at 9pm with the good lamp on.
- 01 Eastside - benny blanco, Halsey & Khalid
- 02 Lonely - Justin Bieber & benny blanco
- 03 I Found You - benny blanco & Calvin Harris
- 04 Better Days - OneRepublic
- 05 Cardigan Weather - Ber
- 06 Slow Burn - Kacey Musgraves
- 07 Put Your Records On - Corinne Bailey Rae
- 08 Little Light - Gregory Alan Isakov
Trivia
- 1.What is Benny Blanco's primary job in the music industry? (Record producer and songwriter.)
- 2.Which viral 2018 single credited to benny blanco features Halsey and Khalid? (Eastside.)
- 3.Benny Blanco is also known for a second creative passion that shows up in his public life. What is it? (Cooking (he published a cookbook, Open Wide).)
- 4.Which superstar did Blanco collaborate with on the 2024 album Snowfall? (Justin Bieber? No, Lana Del Rey? The correct answer is: he has worked closely with Justin Bieber on multiple releases.)
- 5.What broad genre does 'F*Ck Failure' belong to? (Nonfiction, self-help and motivational.)
- 6.The book's central argument reframes what common experience as useful rather than shameful? (Failure.)
- 7.Blanco began his production career as a protege of which prolific hitmaker? (Dr. Luke.)
- 8.Is 'F*Ck Failure' written as a novel or as direct address to the reader? (Direct address, in a conversational advice style.)
Bookmarks
Print, cut, and tuck one at every seat, a small keepsake from the night.
“The first draft was never supposed to be the good one.”
“Warm mug, cold rejection letter, still here anyway.”
“Burnt edges. Best part of the pan.”
Rate the book
We hope the company was good and the conversation even better. Until the next chapter.